🗞️ CARNE ASADA EN LAS TETAS TIMES EXCLUSIVE 🗞️ "Dear Mathias Gruber: The GitHub Gospel That Shamed the Staff Shrine" By Abby, Editor-in-Spite, Markdown Enthusiast & Righteous Screecher

 

You know where most people go to air their workplace grievances? A whisper in the break room. A passive-aggressive sticky note. Maybe a meme in the Tavern if you’re feeling spicy. But one brave, radiant, chakra-blessed soul walked into the unholiest of temples—the GitHub Issues tab—and dropped a 31-line chakra strike that is still echoing through the halls of Seichi’s neglected moderation dungeon.

📌 Read it yourself if you dare: https://github.com/studie-tech/TheNinjaRPG/issues/545

Yes, shinobi. This is real. This is Issue #545. And this is the only kind of Staff Issue we stan.

The anonymous prophet (okay, not that anonymous—it’s Adrian M-Byte, bless your syntax) opens the scroll with a chef’s kiss:

“Dear Mathias Gruber,”
—a greeting so powerful we had to sit down.

That’s Terriator. The Boss. The Big T. The sacred bureaucrat whose communication frequency is set to “GitHub or GTFO.” And Adrian? Adrian understood the assignment.

No Discord drama. No vague Tavern jabs. Just a public, permanent, indexed, SEO-optimized, HR-certified markdown-letter filled with calm rage and hotter facts than Shine’s desert dunes.

And let us be clear, this wasn’t a rant. This was a masterclass. The letter reads like if a resignation, a TED Talk, and a bug report had a baby. Each line scalpel-precise:

• Accountability? Checked.

• Mod favoritism? Dragged.

• Community silence? Exposed like a glitchy boss in fogless combat.

We would quote it all, but honestly? Go read it. Print it. Tattoo it. Whisper it to your summon.

And what did Terriator do? Absolutely nothing so far, because let’s be honest: the only thing slower than patch notes is staff response to public shaming. Which is exactly why this was posted there. The man checks GitHub more than he breathes.

So to the community member who wrote this: we feel you. We hear you. We would throw chakra roses at your feet if we weren’t already spending all our ryo on foot pics to survive the economy.

In a world where bans rain down like typhoon jutsu, where staff dodge questions like they’re in a dodgeball filler arc, you pulled a full-on narrative ninjutsu reversal.

Final thoughts?

• 🐾 Adrian is our new union leader.

• 🧂 The salt is righteous.

• 🖇 GitHub is now our confession booth.

Next time you want to make a statement, skip the forum post. Write a forked-up GitHub issue, sign it “Concerned Citizen,” and watch the system glitch.

—

This has been CATT. We link receipts, not regrets.

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