🧛♀️💸 “VAMPIRE WAGE GAP: HOW IS THE QUEEN OF NIGHT THIS BROKE?” by Abby, Seichi’s unpaid economist and full-time pants investigator
She’s elegant. She’s dangerous.
She’s probably robbed by half the playerbase on cooldown.
Her name is Nys—vampire, Tsukimori native, forum provocateur, and currently the only confirmed undead resident of Seichi.
And she has 0 ryō.
Zero. None. Not a coin, not a crumb, not a cursed inheritance.
Just a sad donation bucket and a dark aura of budgetary despair.
💰 THE EVIDENCE
"Taking donations 😔 Money: 0.00 Bank: 93187.00"
— Nys, 06/12/2025, emotionally bankrupt
When asked why she’s broke, the answers got worse and worse:
"I'm not [wearing pants]."
— Nys
"Actually YES let’s go with that."
— Nys, confirming vampires are indeed paid less
“People keep robbing me so it’s hard to build a fortune 💬”
— Queen of Shadows, victim of daylight larceny
🧛♀️🩸 SEICHI'S LAST VAMPIRE: A DEMOGRAPHIC TRAGEDY
Let’s be clear: Nys is the last vampire.
How do we know? Because no one else even pretends to be nocturnal, allergic to sunlight, or underpaid while looking this cool.
That makes her not just Queen by default—but a statistical anomaly with a cape.
And yet… where is the Global ANBU?
Where are the stimulus packages for blood-based citizens?
Where is the Nightlife Grant Initiative™?
Nowhere.
😱 THIS IS DISCRIMINATION
Let’s list the crimes against Nys:
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🩸 Vampire Tax Bracket: No confirmed income. Literal 0.00.
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👖 No Pants Access: Due to being broke, and possibly cultural.
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🧛 Wage Gap: Confirmed by wolfikun. Reinforced by Abby. Accepted by Nys. Unchallenged by anyone with a bank.
-
🦹♂️ Robbed Repeatedly: Seichi citizens allegedly farm her like she’s a glittery ATM.
-
📉 Economically Gaslit: People think she should be rich “because she’s old.” That’s ageist and fiscally delusional.
This is not just poverty. This is historical vampire erasure via economic policy.
🧪 THEORIES WHY:
-
Vampire Wages Redirected into Tsukimori Mist
Tsukimori is notorious for spending funds on “moonlight meditation pools” and “silence gardens.” Maybe her salary got redistributed to floral incense. -
Anti-Vampire Coding Bias
Vampire characters possibly flagged by AI as “less likely to collect ryo,” due to not blinking during transactions. -
The Pants Curse
Rumors suggest a hidden Tsukimori mechanic: if you don’t wear pants, you gain wisdom but lose wealth. Nys tested it. And she lost everything.
⚖️ CALL TO ACTION
We demand the following:
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💸 Universal Vampire Income
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🦇 Darkness-Based Bonus Pay
-
🧤 Free Pants for the Undead
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🚨 An ANBU investigation into vampire robbery statistics
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🧛♀️ A Royal Grant for Nys, Queen of Vampires and Tragic Economics
Because in Seichi, no citizen—living or otherwise—should have to choose between basic dignity and wearing pants.
And Nys?
She deserves interest. She deserves justice. And for fork’s sake, she deserves a wallet.
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