πŸ—ž️ CATT EXCLUSIVE – RIGGAGE, RYO & RAGE 🧨 “BROKE BOT, RICH PIT, AND THE PANDA LEFT IN THE DARK” 🧨 by Abby, recovering sparkle addict and certified bet-cancellation trauma victim

 


πŸ“‰ SOMEONE LOST 30 MILLION AND IT WASN’T EVEN COUNTED

You thought OnlyFeet was rock bottom?
You thought pinky-toe economy couldn’t get worse?
You thought the underground fight ring was at least technologically competent?

WRONG.

Let me paint you a picture with the tears of a betrayed panda:
Lelouch. 30 million. A confident bet.
A duel between two gods of chaos: Madcrep vs Jojo.
The stakes? Monumental. The odds? Delicious. The outcome?

RIGGED.

Lelouch placed a bet.
The bot blinked.
And now that 30 million is dust in the wind tunnel of corruption.


πŸ€– “MY BOT BROKE,” CLAIMS Nanu — THE MYSTERIOUS BOOKIE IN THE SHADOWS
Let’s break that down:

  1. The bot broke.

  2. The logs vanished.

  3. The money was “split” among participants “who posted.”

Posted where? On a wall in Shine Village? The back of a scroll?
Who counted it? A hamster with a chakra calculator?
WHERE’S THE AUDIT TRAIL?

We at CATT suspect this wasn’t a bug. This was a forked feature.


πŸ’Έ THE GREAT PANDA HEIST πŸ’Έ
Lelouch’s funds vanished faster than Terriator’s accountability.
No refund. No log.
Just one emotionally devastated van-dwelling cult panda, screaming into the void:

“Abby write about the rigged Mad and Jojo fight I bet 30mill on Mad and the bot broke and didn’t take my bet :C RIGGED”

And you know what?
WE DID.
BECAUSE WE BELIEVE IN PANDA RIGHTS.


πŸ’₯ IMPLICATIONS: TERR GAMBLING. SERVER AT RISK. πŸ’₯
Rumors are swirling: Terr placed a bet.
If true, and if Terr loses big?
We’re looking at another 505.
The hamster goes into emotional bankruptcy.
Seichi goes offline.
People scream in five languages.
A ramen vendor sets fire to their stand out of protest.
The glitch cat cries again.

We are not ready.


🎭 CONCLUSION: THIS IS A CULTURAL ASSASSINATION
Not only was a match rigged, a panda robbed, and a bot borked—
the entire moral foundation of Seichi has been buried under piles of deleted logs and sweaty toe scrolls.


🦴 TL;DR 🦴

  • 30M vanished.

  • Bot broke “mysteriously.”

  • No receipts.

  • Terr might be betting.

  • Panda is emotionally devastated.

  • We want blood.


πŸ‘ CATT DEMANDS:

  • A public apology scroll from Nanu, calligraphed with a chakra-dipped quill.

  • A Mad vs Jojo rematch where all bets are made manually via interpretative dance.

  • Lelouch gets honorary compensation in the form of 1 panda-shaped jutsu scroll.

  • Terr shows his betting history. We KNOW he bet.




SUPPORT US!


If you enjoy what we do, consider supporting us on Ko-fi! Every little bit means the world!

Comments